Esther fights with facebook … Oh, yeah, and we’re doing a show with the Pattys … yipeee

Ever have a completely frustrating day where your computer, the internet, and the tech world in general seems to be railing against you? You start off well, with good intentions … “I’ll just make this cyber-flier, and then run the kids to school, do the laundry, work-out, blah, blah, blah.” And off you go …

But then … you make the flier and its not quite what you want, so you make it again, and again, and your eyes are starting to hurt from the laptop screen, and your bum’s starting to hurt from sitting at the kitchen table. In between all this you wake your kids up, make snacks for them to take to school (healthy, but not too bland right?) you pretend you’re listening to their stories, argue with them about teeth and hair brushing. But, all the time you’re just thinking … “man, I just want to finish those fliers and get them uploaded.”

LoftFlier1

You work on the fliers, get em done, and boom, its time to collect one of your kids from school already. But crap, the darn flier won’t load. Facebook says: “no .. not enough pixels”. What the heck?! So … back to the drawing board … take another photo with more pixels, download it, edit it, upload it, Facebook says, “no, no, no!”

In between this you’re teaching math to your 15 year old (crazy complicated shit: reducing fractions using prime factorization!) The huge pile of laundry that’s mutated into it’s own primeval life-force is calling your name from the basement, and your husband texts to say: “hope you’re dong some laundry today” (he bathed without a clean towel this morning and is being jovial – unaware of what you might do to him later for this untimely text).

Meanwhile you’re looking after your one sick kid on the sofa, running out to pick up more kids to take them to soccer, listen to more stories, look interested and give standard comments in return, “really? wow! cool?” (no idea what they are talking about – still thinking about effing fliers and Facebook’s inexplicable stubborn-ness)

You finally realize Facebook just wants you to make the picture fatter! You do so … it uploads …. JOY!! (even as its uploading you know the satisfaction you’ll gain from completing this tiny task will in no way be worth the time or energy it took)

This is the FAT flier:

This is the FAT flier

Then, husband is home. He cooks dinner like a saint (chicken curry – my fav). You get your run in. Feeling good when you realize you were supposed to email some journalists about an upcoming show because your alter-ego is a groovy musician type. Writing the email to aforementioned journalists when your husband comes in and says, “why are you not hanging out with me?” SNAP! You tell him to sod off (in not  so many words)

Sparks the chef/saint

Then, you finish the stupid email. Look back on your day and laugh, acknowledging to yourself that you have obsessed over trivial shit all day long! I would feel some kind of guilt or shame, but I’m too old for that crap. You forgive yourself and apologize to husband, get some icecream (just a wee bit, or all that running will be for nothing!) and curl up on the sofa with husband in front of cheesy sci-fi.

ALSO … yay! We get to do a show with the Pattys on April 20th in the Springs and it will rock. My groovy musician alter-ego can hardly wait. Here’s the fliers for it:

LoftFlier1

LoftFlier3

LoftFlier2

Today I will … clean toilets, do laundry, work-out, teach math, nurse sick one on sofa, run wains around …. and in between, I’ll post some nonsensical ramblings about being a self-employed musician and a mum. You feel me Michelle Patterson?

 

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